First of all, I want to apologize for the fact that I have no pictures in my blogs today. Blogger makes me angry. *deep breath* Secondly, I want to apologize for NBC for getting rid of The Biggest Loser theme song and replacing it with something more serious. Like heart beats and Jillian yelling.
It is the first day on the ranch for the newly chosen Losers, and no sooner have they put on their shiny new shirts and stood in a double rainbow formation, Ali lays some wisdom on them: They are not alone.
TWIST #1: Bob and Jillian got to chose one contestant each from the eliminated contestants last week. I had my fingers crossed for dread locks, but no. Jillian chose Elizabeth (the girl who passed out after doing step ups) and Bob chose Aaron (the guy who had the cutest little boy ever).
TWIST #2: Ali announces that although they are wearing matching shirts, they will be competeing individually. WHAT? I am loving this season more and more.
Armed with new knowledge the contestants cheerfully stampede to the sounds of cattle drive music to the gym. Eagerly awaiting them is Bob, Jillian, and a 7 inch incline on the treadmill. Don't hold on, it's going to be a bumpy ride. Bob gets totally Debbie Allen in the beginning of Fame on these guys.
"They're still smiling!" Jillian says. Five puke shots, passing out, our first face plant by Tina Grandma Glasses, and Elizabeth heavy breathing later, Jillian says, "Now, was that so bad?"
Dr. H, newly shorn, takes a cue from Ali and lays more knowledge on the contestants: They are seriously unhealthy. Diabetic, high cholesterol, 50% body fat, gastric bypass at 14 unhealthy. Then the contestants meet with Bob and Jillian to discuss what calories are (one contestant says "what makes you fat") and why people shouldn't eat sandwiches with names called "The Terminator" and "The Grave Digger". SIDE NOTE: Alton Brown takes offense to the show Man Vs. Food in this fascinating article. It couldn't come at a better time!
The second day of working out is not any better. Bob's response to Jillian's MIND BULLETS is his CROSS HAIRS. In them: Brandon, who foolishly asked if they were almost done working out. Bob makes him spit, blow snot out of his nose, and sweat until he is broken. Then while we still have our appetities, Bob and Jillian bring in those gross sandwiches we were just talking about so that they can shove it down everyone's throats. Not the sandwiches, but the knowledge that they are NASTY and full of bad for you things.
TWIST #3: Ali tells the contestants that they will be weighing in tonight- surprise! "I wouldn't have had that last apple," complains Fredo. I don't think apples are the problem, big guy.
TWIST #4: The yellow line is moving on up! Eight spots to be precise. Half of the contestants will be above it and half will be below it and in danger of elimination. The weigh in winners will be based on the total percentage of fat loss. How does everyone stack up?
Rick: From 350 lbs to 314 lbs- 36 lbs lost- 10.29% BW
Mark: From 421 lbs to 380 lbs- 41 lbs lost- 9.74% BW
Brendan: From 362 lbs to 331 lbs- 31 lbs lost- 8.56% BW
Adam: From 402 lbs to 368 lbs- 34 lbs lost- 8.46% BW
Jesse: From 369 lbs to 339 lbs- 30 lbs lost- 8.10% BW
Frado: From 367 lbs to 340 lbs- 27 lbs lost- 7.36% BW
Ada: From 258 lbs to 240 lbs- 18 lbs lost- 6.98% BW
Aaron: From 468 lbs to 438 lbs- 30 lbs lost- 6.41% BW
Tina: From 263 lbs to 247 lbs- 16 lbs lost- 6.08% BW
Lisa: From 288 lbs to 272 lbs- 16 lbs lost- 5.56% BW
Patrick: From 400 lbs to 378 lbs- 22 lbs lost- 5.50% BW
Allie: From 322 lbs to 305 lbs- 17 lbs lost- 5.28% BW
Burgandy: From 231 lbs to 219 lbs- 12 lbs lost- 5.19% BW
Sophia: From 272 lbs to 258 lbs- 14 lbs lost- 5.15% BW
Jessica: From 282 lbs to 268 lbs- 14 lbs lost- 4.96% BW
Elizabeth: From 244 lbs to 232 lbs- 12 lbs lost- 4.92% BW
TWIST #5: The person with the highest percentage of weight loss (Rick) can save one person under the yellow line.
TWIST #6: The challenge for this week is only for the people under the yellow line. They have to save themselves. The bottom two will be voted on for elimination.
Rick choses to save the one guy under the yellow line: Patrick. Now it is all ladies in the race of their lives at the elimination challenge. There will be five races where a flag will be grabbed and the grabber will be safe. The last two without a flag will be up for elimination. Things get catty between the wierdly named BURGANDY and Jessica when former sprinter Burgandy accuses Jessica of not staying in her lane. Note to Burgandy: no lanes. So. . .yeah.
TWIST #7: Allie and Tina Grandma Glasses are in the bottom two and will be voted on by the eight above the yellow line.
Strategically, they choose the younger more mobile contestant to be sent home, and Allie says good bye to the ranch.
TWIST #8: No vending machines this year. What is this season turning into? SO MANY CHANGES.
The at home reveal finds an Allie who has lost 60 pounds and has moved out of her home and into season eight winner Danny's home. Nothing weird about that. Nope. Danny says he is paying it forward-- just like this season's theme!
Next week: shock and jocks with Jillian who claims to still be the only man in charge.