Bridal Boot Camp- episode 3: "How do you gain two pounds on a weight loss show?"

On a show where you are working as a team AND having to lose weight as an individual, you have to perform well as a team player and work your butt off (literally) so your weight loss is covered, too. This week, Bridal Team Blue and Green reached a shaky alliance with both aspects of the game, and one team failed in a BIG way. Not in a big fat way. Just a big way.

Bridal Team Blue starts the episode out in the rain, and Tesha is over it. She walks off the field, leaving Steve to say, "I'm the guy who decides who quits!" Apparently not.

VH1 TV Shows Music Videos Celebrity Photos News & Gossip

Trainer Francesca (we don't hear too much out of her, you know?) is frustrated after her Bridal Team Green lost last week's Marital Mission, and she shows her displeasure by putting them through a grueling workout involving lots of swimming. That's good, because they are going to need all the help they can get. . .

Meanwhile, Steve catches up with a somber Tesha in the barracks, who reveals the reason for her naughty behavior is she is missing her kids back home. She wants to quit, but Steve reminds her that quitting would set a bad example for her children, and "I can't let you quit and feel good about it." The lights come on for Tesha, who realizes it isn't just about winning her dream wedding, but making a lasting lifestyle change for her and her family.

Then the ladies receive their invites from Cynthia for this week's Marital Mission, called Consummating Your Marriage. I was worried- I know sex burns a lot of calories, but wha? My fears were assuaged: It only involved the marital bed. No sexy time. The women have to run while carrying their mattress over their heads, attach the mattress to a raft, and then tow the raft while paddling a canoe around a buoy and back to shore. Sounds complicated.

Since Bridal Team Green's Lauren lost the largest percentage of body weight last week, she gets to answer a question posed by her fiancee, Ryan (who won in this deal- Lauren is a cute girl) for an advantage in the game. She gets it right, and Bridal Team Green gets to run on the inside of the track which is supposed to be faster. You would never know it, though, because Bridal Team Blue tears out of the starting gate like speedy bridezillas, quickly taking the lead.

I thought since Green team had so much swimming training earlier they would have been champs when it came to getting their canoes out. Melissa got the mattress raft stuck in the mud, Lauren overturned their canoe, and somehow, ginger Courtney stayed in her canoe and dry while the rest of the team struggled in the water. Again, Courtney is not racking up any popularity points.

Bridal Team Blue wins the race and honeymoon vacations for all! Bridal Team Green gets a trip to the Fitting Room. Back at the barracks, Melissa and Lauren gang up on fair skinned Courtney and tell her that if she is in the bottom two, she will be getting sent home.

On the winner's pier, Cynthia weighs in the Blue team. Will Jamie get her ass handed to her this week?

Jamie: From 139 lbs to 134 lbs- 5 lbs lost (whew.)
Amberly: From 159 lbs to 157 lbs- 2 lbs lost
Tesha: From 148 lbs to 145 lbs- 3 lbs lost
Tara: From 180 lbs to 177 lbs- 3 lbs lost

Then the wedding bells chime and it is time for Green team to head to the Fitting Room.

Melissa: From 168 lbs to 166 lbs- 2 lbs lost
Kacey: From 138 lbs to 135 lbs- 3 lbs lost
Lauren: From 165 lbs to 167 lbs- 2 lbs gained
Courtney: From 147 lbs to 145 lbs- 2 lbs lost

VH1 TV Shows Music Videos Celebrity Photos News & Gossip

In a cruel twist of mean girls fate, Melissa and Lauren are in the bottom two and Courtney is safe. Karma is a bitch, right? Lauren is weeping and asking how you can gain weight on a weight loss show and Kacey is yelling at Courtney and telling her she should put herself in the losing position.

And save someone who was mean to her earlier? Sorry, cowgirl. Cynthia tells Courtney if she keeps losing weight she'll stay out of the bottom two, and tells Lauren that she said it herself: How do you gain weight on a weight loss show? She discharges Lauren from duty and Lauren is sent packing.

Next week? CAKE WRESTLING. Sounds delicious.